Oct 18, 2013

don't expect everyone to love like you do

A lot of the time we feel we shouldn't give more than we take in a friendship - give and take equally; don't let someone be your priority if you're only an option.

I've come to realise that sometimes it's harder to pull away than to continue giving and loving. Maybe we're meant to love. Maybe sometimes we'd like to disregard reciprocation and just show someone love just because they're amazing and you want to. Just disregard the arguments for fairness, and disregard the pain.

Sometimes we hurt and pull away because we expect. And I've told myself to stop hoping and expecting but I still do, and things rarely live up to expectations, especially people. Maybe the key is in not expecting. Maybe it's just in doing what you want to do, and letting love lie just like that. Maybe the key is in learning to stop leaving your giving hand outstretched.

The key's in knowing that you are a unique individual who perceives the world and friendships in a certain way, and accepting the fact that not everyone's like you.

It's something I told a friend recently, and as I taught her this important life lesson, I knew I was reminding myself, too. It's something I've yet to learn, evidently now. Hopes don't die easy. You have to kill them again and again.

here's something we need to learn about life
we love people, a lot
but not everyone loves like you and i love
but it doesn't make them wrong
they just have a different way of doing things, but it doesn't mean they don't love you
personally, i love my close friends a lot. and sometimes i sacrifice a lot for them
like i'm sacrificing my lecture for you now
but i can't expect them to sacrifice the same for me
not because they don't love me
but they have different ideas of friendship, and different priorities and mindsets
people are just different, and the problem is that we look at how we are and expect everyone else to see things the way we do

okay if you say that being close friends doesnt mean that she will do the same things for you
then what if your close friend actually did nothing much for you over the years
like, not willing to spend time with you, she isnt even there with you when youre in the biggest shit in your life

some of my close friends have never wished me happy birthday
but so? it doesn't mean i should hold a grudge or anything
it doesn't mean they don't love me

like how is that even a friend to begin with
if you really care about this friend and you know your bff exists how would you even forget abt it

i can't hold a grudge just because they didn't do something i would do
because that's not how they operate
do i just turn my back on them when they don't reciprocate like i expect them to?
that'd be really really not understanding of me

id prolly just not even care when its their birthday. simple
you treat people how you want to be treated right?

yeah, i know how i want people to treat me
but i know that i can't expect everyone to be like that
not everyone thinks like you and i. not everyone lives life like you and i
and it doesn't mean they don't love you
and we do things in certain ways but some people don't
just cos my friends don't seem to reciprocate when i give, doesn't mean they don't love me
i just have to suck it in and understand that certain people do things differently

but the thing is, why are u sucking it in when it doesnt really benefit you

because i can't just burn a bridge like that
that doesn't mean they don't love me
and it doesn't mean that they're not worthy of being friends
jacey, you're a beautiful girl
you're amazing in your loyalty and it's very, very very hard to find
but few people are like that
and it's not that they're bad people
they're just brought up differently, they grew up differently and they do things differently
maybe they're not as emotionally sensitive and able to detect feelings like you do
but that doesn't mean they're bad people
you're a beautiful person, jacey. i just need you to know that not everyone is beautiful in the exact same way as you

No comments: