ACJC Dance

Warm-ups were enough to kill me. If I were to do these warm-ups everyday it'd take me less than a month to look like a body-builder.

Friday is technique class so we have to do stuff that make me look like an idiot when I attempt them. At one point, when we were doing these spinny thingies (I won't even attempt to use the technical terms because I can't) in a row of three across the studio, she singled me out because I wasn't doing it right - my back leg was coming up too late AND she didn't mention this but I knew I was taking too large steps - and I had to repeat it - SOLO, with the whole of Dance watching - a few times.

And initially I was like, "Okay, it's okay, it's only the beginning of the year and not many people know me yet" but then Douglas (I'm assuming it's him 'cos he's the only J2 guy who knows my name) said "Go Karen!" and then everyone started saying "Go Karen!" and cheering. And I was like, ah well. Their enthusiasm and spirit are really nice though.

Well, I guess I really don't care about losing face anymore. If I were my Sec One self I'd be hating Dance and hating how I'm not able to do anything, feeling thoroughly humiliated and wanting to run away. But I'm not. I'm older now and Crescent Dance and Liu Laoshi have taught me that the less concerned I am about losing face, the more I gain.

I've probably already become known for my inability to remember and execute steps anyway. I'm always the one blundering, the one who isn't able to catch up, the one who doesn't know what she's doing. Grr. I will try, I really will. I might be able to do it if Miss Wee were to count the beats ten times slower.

Then Miss Wee had each guy form a group with two girls to do LIFTS!!! Geraldine and I went with a J2 guy called Vanka (who reminds me a little of Kester). Vanka's only 2kg heavier than Geraldine and I (we're both 43kg) so he must've had a really hard time lifting us. I was unable to keep myself balanced at one point in time, and Geraldine had blisters from the spins so she couldn't jump high. Vanka must've felt like dying. Thank goodness the lifts were only the basic ones.

I watched Joanne being lifted and was reminded of AYG:

Joanne's a pro. (I was actually supposed to take her place in doing this but I wasn't able to do it properly and the guy got pissed.) This lift isn't easy. The guy's left hand supports the girl's left foot while his right hand supports her butt. The girl's right leg is raised. When I did it I kept not tucking my right foot in properly and I couldn't seem to be able to turn my left foot out, which resulted in the guy having to turn in circles to keep me balanced.

I go through Dance in JC now and I'm really reminded of my memories of Crescent Dance when I was in lower secondary. I hated everything; it was all so hard and I was the only person who couldn't do anything. Everyone else danced so well; my seniors spent so much time helping me get just one move right. I was frustrated and so humiliated. I felt this wasn't the right CCA for me. I just couldn't do anything right.

And then I became a senior and learnt to love Dance. I learnt to throw my "face" away. Being Discipline Mistress helped a lot too when I was forced to realise Dance's good points and faults.

Now it's like history is repeating itself; I'm in a dance studio with enthusiastic, pro seniors and I just can't seem to get my stuff right at all. I'm definitely not hating any part of it, though. In fact, the complexity of the moves only makes me love AC Dance even more. The moves are beautiful, stuff I've never been able to imagine myself doing. And now I'm doing them - I'm looking like a completely idiotic klutz trying to get it right, but at least I'm learning, and there's hope.