Jul 7, 2011

the little things she tells herself

Dear fragility,

sometimes I fight you with ignorance, when things are going good and I...convince myself the loneliness is a lie. I push you out, forgetting.

And then just a comment, just a bit of carelessness, and you knock me over again.

I'm talented. I'm not fat. I look better when I smile. I'm more beautiful than people think. Maybe, with enough repetition, I will slowly teach myself to believe. Five millilitres of self-esteem a day - bitter medicine - someday it'll yield results.

That little mocking voice in my head, that thin glass wall that shatters twice a day, fragility, fragility will give way to real strength, self-love.

you know, the problem, dear, is that you try to find your self-worth in these things. these things that don't matter.

Charm is deceptive
and beauty is fleeting,
but a woman who fears the Lord will be praised.
Proverbs 31:30

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