Two less lonely people?

Once upon a time, I was very close to a certain guy I had met in tuition class. At that point in time, I had broken up with my ex not long ago and he had too just one month earlier. We were two people who seemed very fine on the outside but were really utterly broken, desperate, full of horrible secrets nobody else needed to know. We told each other a lot of things, things you'd usually keep to yourself. Things you wouldn't tell someone of the opposite gender. It was a scary, crazy time.

But in our weird way, we built each other up. By knowing someone else knew exactly what we were going through, that would otherwise be an immensely painful, flesh-eating secret, we helped each other out of that dark hole. At times when we were talking to one another and emotions ran wild I would suddenly start shaking, weak with fear. If not for God during those times, I would probably have given in and my life would've started crumbling all over again.

It was a crazy time. Now we don't talk as much anymore but our past was crazy. Thinking about the kind of things we know about each other is scary. But I know he's a good guy.

There must be so, so many other people out there who experience the same kind of sudden desperate pang that hits me once in a while when I wonder how long I'll be able to continue on like that. People desperately in need of love, both the emotional and the physical. In need of a hug, in need of knowing you mean the whole world to someone, in need of an arm around your waist, a kiss on the lips - or more, a whisper in your ear, in need of knowing someone would cry for you.... something beyond friendship.

Maybe you're one of them. So then, we're two people desperately in need of love, desperately wanting to feel that all over again, even if it's just for a day, even if it's just two minutes of passion, or a real hug... two people in need of the same things. so why not take things one step further?

That's how one-night stands come about, right?

Why not? Because the consequences are more lasting than you think. Because it could destroy the flimsy, translucent wall we've taken all this time to build as an attempt at resistance against things like this, and it just might take even longer to rebuild, and then it will be flimsier, more transparent, more willing to give way at the slightest hint of pressure.

Nah, I'm talking rubbish to comfort my ugly, fat self. SHIT. I'm really becoming fat. For real. I took a look at myself in the mirror and began to get worried. I need to start losing weight and getting fit. For Council camp.