Someday you'll see

Someday I'll learn Japanese well and be able to express my feelings in it. It's such a beautiful language.

As I learn more about your past I wish I could learn more about the present you.

For now, knowing my number is saved in your phone makes me happy enough.

-

Funny how listening to most slow Chinese songs gets me really emotional because I'm reminded of the way you used to hug me, the love I felt in your kiss, your hands cupping my face.

Toilets, maple syrup, watching you cook in your kitchen, you wailing uncontrollably as you begged me to stay, your parents' room, taking the bus to places we've never been to, falling asleep in your arms, waking up to the warmth of your gaze, couple rings that I lost, 1314 hearts, arguing, you screaming at me because I refused to let you treat me to a meal, holding hands under the table, lovebites all over, waiting for the train to be empty at Joo Koon, Mogu Mogu, going for counselling, the way you wailed and begged when I told you it was time to let go.

Wrong, I don't have any feelings for you anymore... you're quite gross. I just miss the feeling of being helplessly loved.

If my heart is strong enough, I'll dispel all thoughts of a relationship until my A Levels are over, no matter how perfect the guy seems. God knows I've got no time to screw up any more.

Jacey, stay strong. Guard your heart. Study hard and soar.

Childhood friends. One was someone who shaped my life as a child; the other gave me incredible strength when I was at my weakest, without which I probably wouldn't have had the strength to break up. Friends from the beginning and for ever.