I hate it when a public figure is forced to become someone he isn't. When I was doing ___, I and the others were portrayed as "fun", "vibrant", "energetic", "cute" teenagers - something I couldn't stand. I mean, S's like that - bubbly and energetic and awesome - but I'm not. Neither is J.C, definitely. J.G isn't like that either. At least they didn't make me change my style of writing to make me look like a more "energetic" teenager - they told us all to keep our styles of writing - but I was put off by the exclamation marks they used in my profile and how they made me sound. I mean, what was with that name? And all my friends who commented on how my profile was written agreed that I sounded like a gross lame wannabe-cool teen. When I said it wasn't written by me, they said oh thank God. At least they didn't edit my posts to make me sound more hyper. That's just not me. Well, that was a good experience lah, but I've also learnt a few things - when someone's paying you, they control which sides of you to portray, and exaggerate most of it such that your personality that's implied isn't really who you are.
If I were to become some "public figure" one day - I'm just using myself as an example - I'd be very, very angry if I were made to do something that isn't me. Like if they asked me to portray a cuter image, or sexier. I'm just not the kind to do cutesy poses or wear mini-skirts or crave for extreme fun and for freedom from parents and smash guitars. Maddie and Avril Lavigne have very distinct I'm-a-free-bitch-and-nobody-can-stop-me-from-doing-anything-I-want personalities; JT's very hip-hop and cheerful; Angel Lin Hsin Lei's very cutesy. They fall under a distinct personality, which is what most singers need to do. By2's very cutesy and at the same time are portrayed as girls full of life, energy and fun.
If I were made to change my image or say/do things that aren't "me", I'd be really furious about it. I probably wouldn't be brave enough to refuse because they'd have control over my career, but I'd probably lash out privately and let as many people as possible know that that isn't something I'd do.
I think I've just ruined my future career by saying that.
I'm me. Boring old me, anti-social but very noisy if I feel comfortable enough around you. I like to hold deep, thought-provoking conversations. I don't like the taste of alcohol. I've been a major fan of a local Chinese pop singer for four years. I don't like singers who sing songs with lyrics that talk extensively about sex, hate or violence, or use vulgarities in their songs. Yeah you could say they're "being themselves" - but with power comes responsibility. They're spreading immorality through music and that's just wrong. Music is highly influential. Music is a beautiful gift of God's.
I'm very concerned about the environment and I talk a lot about saving paper. I love Japan's little towns and super friendly people. I whine about my fat ass and thighs. I have a bad first impression of people who are extremely good-looking. I can get mildly emo sometimes, but my life's not that interesting. I don't really try hard for a lot of things, especially schoolwork. I give up easily. I get put down easily.
That's me. I'm not the kind who craves freedom, not the rebellious kind who hates responsibilities and being told what to do, not an adventure-seeker, not cute, not a clubber, not an energetic, vibrant youth. I'm not madly in love with anything. I'm not very anything. I'm boring old me, but if anyone tries to change that I'll become a silent (because I'm too chicken) rebellious protester.
I mean, if anyone tries to make me do a High School Musical routine on stage I will be very angry about it to my friends, but I'll do it anyway because getting to perform on stage is a rare thing. If they make me do what Gayle Nerva's doing on Okto I will cry and make sure everyone knows I'm not really like that, but I just might do it anyway because I'd do anything to get to where I want to get eventually. Where's that? I want to be able to help and influence people, like how JJ changed my life - and many others' - with his singing. I don't even want to go into the details of how he did that because it'd be an hour before I got that done. There are just too many ways in which he's transformed my life and helped me.
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