Acid tongue

O levels English oral was......i really hope I get a high A1. When I was reading aloud, dear Michelle (s2b) who was being examined at the same time too was reading SO SUPER LOUDLY I lost track of what I was saying. I was still reading the passage but I wasn't clear about what I was saying. Die already lah. Picture conversation was okay. It was about some...doctor treating a whole load of elderly people.

Conversation wasn't very good.

"What do you do to stay healthy?" or something like that, I totally screwed up, talked about making sure I washed my hands before I ate / used my hand sanitizer / washed my hands after touching something dirty to make sure I wouldn't get SICK. And then I talked about keeping my room clean because I was allergic to dust.
(It's all rubbish by the way.)
Yeah so I was WAYYY out of point.

Then the next question was something about the quality of Singapore's healthcare, I wanted to laugh. I used some of my SS knowledge. I said something stupid like "I've been to countries like Malaysia and Korea (Idk why on Earth I said Korea, its medical facilities aren't that bad right, and no I've never been there), and I feel that Singapore's healthcare standard is much better than most other countries', because the government makes us pay for our own healthcare..... (realises I'm talking about the wrong SS info and it's totally irrelevant) ..and the government practises privatisation, so the hospitals do not receive funding so they must improve and do better, and they must make healthcare affordable for us, so that they will encourage more people to go there (encourage people to GO TO A HOSPITAL?) ..And the government encourages Singaporens to stay healthy (realises I'm going out of point) ... so that we won't exhaust the coutry's medical resources because Singapore is a country with no resources (lol, I'm talking about two completely different kinds of resources)"

...Great. They must've thought I was a rambling airhead.

Then they asked something about how doctors might face problems or something with giving medicine? Or something. So I said that the doctors might be treating a poor patient who cannot afford the expensive medicines, but the doctor can't help him/her by paying for it himself because then other people would take advantage of that too, and the doctor would end up having to "suffer" (the examiner laughed when I said that) for the patients.

GREAT.
I was planning on getting almost full marks for my Eng oral, because it's highly probable that I'd screw up my comprehension as usual, and then I wouldn't be able to get my A1. I think it was super wasted can. This wasn't a hard exam. It was relatively easy, the questions they asked and the passage and the picture weren't difficult at all. And I just screwed it. Great. Great.

I need that almost-perfect score. I guess I'm dead.

It sucks to be behind Jessie for everything. Her Chinese is very fluent so for Chinese Oral I always scored so much lower than her. As for English oral, her points are very good and mine are all over the place. JESSIE SUAH! ):


I hate it when 1. people make assumptions about me, 2. they don't come up to me and tell me when they're unhappy about something I'm doing. Then you'll just go bitch bitch bitch and have a bad impression of me when it's really just a stupid misunderstanding.

I hate this. You, my dear friend, you tell me not to care about others' opinions, to make desicions on my own. So that's what I do. I make desicions on my own. Then all these happen. You tell me not to follow what others think. Yet I have to clarify things with everyone, do things that would please certain people, and then you say because I'm doing that, I'm making everyone unhappy.
Your instructions are crystal-clear, seriously.

Then again, what am I doing now? I'm still following someone else, making my desicions based on what someone else says. You.
"Okay, I've decided. I won't let other people's opinions affect me. I won't let what other people say affect how I want things to be. Eh, do you think this arrangement is okay?"

I just love my life. I keep saying I hate it when other people control what I do etc, yet I always end up being a slave to everyone else's opinions anyway. When I finally try to stand firm, oh no, suddenly everyone's unhappy and demanding I listen to them. Wonderful.


But I'm still thankful that you told me, and I still am grateful to have you as a friend, someone who isn't afraid to tell me what she really thinks, someone who doesn't care if she hurts me, as long as she gets her point across and I see the truth. That's the way to care for a friend.

I hate it when someone has negative opinions about me / don't like something about me / something I'm doing, and doesn't tell me. I'm not God you know, I wouldn't know what the problem is if you keep it to yourself. If there's something you don't like about me, you'd better tell it to my face so that I'd be able to realise the problem and perhaps do something about it, or clarify things, and not keep it to yourself, because when I realise you've been keeping it to yourself, I'll be really hurt and very angry.