Sep 17, 2012

when your heart breaks for those who know the truth

Sometimes you want to believe in something so bad. You've given your life to it. The hungry demons are at your every corner trying to lure you out of your little idealistic hole. You try to fend them off but you only have two hands. No, I know this is right, I know this is right, but the only other person who agrees is God, maybe, hopefully.

People tell you you're just being stupid. They've seen the world. They know nothing turns out like you think. Doing well in school doesn't mean you will have a nice family and a nice house. Putting trust in people means you'll either get cheated or very disappointed. Thinking you have the power to make a mark in the world is simply delusional. Being ever-ready to help only means you're asking to be walked over. You can't make it big through honest means. There is no such thing as a community of pure love - there are always the politics and the gossip, or they just want your money. You'll never get anywhere if you don't take the tried and tested route. Going into education to inspire and enlighten young minds is a spark you see only in the eyes of young, newborn teachers. Trust the vetrans. They know.

NO, they don't know; ignorance irks you, arrogance puts you off, selfishness is something you don't understand, but when you meet someone who has lost hope, all you feel is a hole in your heart. You suddenly feel listless. You don't feel like speaking to anybody, you can't even write, you don't want to listen to a song, you just feel like all of the light in your heart has been sucked out because you're imagining a minute in their shoes.

Hope is your every breath. Hope is the food of your soul. Sure, it only means your heart gets thrown down on the floor every day, but you just can't help but hope. It's irrational hope. They still say I'm naive. Some of them think it's cute, how naive I am. They assume I haven't been hurt by the world. Of course I have. I have more than those who don't hope. It's just that I can't stop from hoping. It's all I do.

it takes an ocean not to break

No comments: